Friday, 24 April 2009

Move forward, dont look back.

If time travel was possible, would you go back and change anything?
Recently I have had reason to think about this, and my answer is no, the past makes us what we are now, if we changed something then we would be different and would you really be any different to what you are now? Think about your answer carefully, you would not have your kids, your friends, your job. Small changes can be make bigger ones down the line, this is known as 'the butterfly effect' in Chaos circles.
All of our life we are ruled by the past, what we learnt at school, the mistakes in our teens, how we grew up, the morals we acquired from our parents and peers. Morals and attitudes do change as we grow and learn, we take different paths as we learn more about life and base our decisions on how we compare the present to the past.
Friends reunited has a lot to answer for, apparently is has caused more marridge breakdowns recently than any other cause, I met Ruth (my partner) through FR she tracked me down more to see what I was up to these days, I have now lived with her for 5 years. I also know two families that have been completely wrecked by friends reunited as well, in one the husband contacted his first girlfriend from school and within a week they had embarked on an affair, he says it made him feel young again, but how long did it last? 6 months, they are not the same people as they were 25 years ago, the initial rush of lust died down and they came to realise that their lives had changed long ago, the are now both living alone, their families are not going to forgive them in a hurry. Yet at the time they were so sure it was the right thing to do.

Humans are creatures of emotion, little chemicals changes can make massive differences to the way we react to situations, adrenaline is a good case to cite, it is what gives us our 'fight or flight' reaction to danger, the problem is, especially if you have lived a bit of a humdrum life, the bloke cited above worked in a office for most of his life and to be honest was very boring (I hope he does not read this..), suddenly getting some exciement can get the old adrenaline flowing and adrenaline is highly addictive, well I believe it is, I may have to check that .
There are other emotions as well, things that can well up from the past and haunt us, or in my case make my life more complete and interesting, as in the case of my daughter, who I had not seen for 28 years. Wishing that you could go back and change things will just make you bitter, you can not go back and change anything, so it is better to look forward and work on making your life and the lives of people around you that much better, why look back when you can move forward.


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